Episode 22: Victim to Survivor to Thriver with Marian Bacol-Uba
Marian Bacol-Uba is a Transformation Coach, Speaker, Holistic Wellness Expert, and a Certified Pranayama and Meditation Teacher. She empowers women to transform trauma into triumphs, heal themselves from within, and create a thriving life in mind, body, and soul with clarity and confidence.
In addition to offering one-on-one coaching and online group programs, Marian speaks and advocates for sexual abuse awareness, mental health and entrepreneurship for women of color (WOC). She has appeared on numerous TV shows, online publications, and podcasts such as CBS Los Angeles, Channel LA-18, The Filipino Channel/ABS-CBN, Elephant Journal, Bustle, CEO Blog Nation, Miami Under 40, The Tao of Self-Confidence Podcast, Daring Woman Podcast, and more. Marian is also the host of Thriver Lifestyle Podcast and Mondays with Marian on YouTube.
On this episode, we talk about her own transformational journey, from numbing with drugs and alcohol to finding meditation and solving her problems internally instead of externally. We talk about going from the victim consciousness to the survivor to the thriver consciousness and what that looks like practically. We also talk about healthy coping mechanisms, healing from anxiety and depression naturally, and her top tips to start meditating. This episode is LOADED with goodness, so I know you will enjoy.
View full show notes: www.alliowen.com/marian
Gratitude Practice – just because it doesn’t feel right right away, doesn’t mean it’s not in the right direction
You have to put the action into it, and the rest will follow. It’s the laws of physics, the laws of motion, you have to get it going and it will pick up momentum
Start really small and simple, it doesn’t have to be extravagant or grand …start small and you build that habit and muscle within yourself
Marian’s own transformational journey
On the outside she did everything by the book, she did what she was supposed to
She didn’t show the signs of mental illness and depression from the outside.
She would solve her anxiety with drugs and alcohol. In 2014 she overdosed
She had tried so many external things to solve the problem, fill the void, but she didn’t heal until she went inward
You have to learn how to crawl before you walk. She started with one minute of meditation
Balancing the masculine and feminine. One small thing everyday
You never know what someone is going through
How she gained the confidence to speak the truth and release the shame
Eckhart Tolle, “The Power of Now”
If you’re always reliving the trauma in your head, it’s because you’re reliving your past
When you realize you aren’t in the now, you become in the now
From victim to survivor to thriver
3 Stages of Consciousness in her upcoming book. Most people live in victim and survivor because most people are unaware of the words and thoughts they say to themselves
When you’re in victim consciousness you have an imbalance of feminine energy
Once trauma is done and you need to heal, if you’re in survivor mode you’re just hanging on.
Survivor is too much in your masculine energy, competitive
Thriver consciousness is being able to take a step back and instead of being reactionary when things happen…we put a label to everything that’s good/ bad…you needed that to break through to reach through another point to elevate to the next level.
What is it that I need to do/ change/heal within myself so that I don’t attract this same type of relationship?
The Universe is actually FOR us, we just need to ask, and ask the right things.
The Universe is always giving us signs…Maybe there was something in your life that you need to pay attention to. The Universe puts things in your life path to wake you up!
Going internally and taking a full account. Is there something you haven’t addressed? Things you haven’t healed? Go inside first and be honest with yourself.
Tiny transformation integration. We always want the big overnight successes
Fundamental healthy coping mechanisms- going to yoga, journal writing, going into nature, breathing, meditation, these simple tools are so powerful
We feel these human emotions for a reason, they key is to not let it stay, to let it pass through you. Let the anger out, get it out of your system and then go into those practices
Anxiety / depression- how she healed hers naturally. Becoming conscious, using breath, and going back to her practices.
First steps if you’re struggling with anxiety and depression…BREATHE…What can I do now? Meditate, maybe you need to sit down, start looking into these small habits and practices into your life. If you don’t know you’re driving on the wrong side of the street, you won’t know.
There is no one right way to meditate
Her top tips for meditation…
Guided meditation first…Insight Timer…Link some of her guided meditations “Surround Yourself with Love”
YouTube Channel: http://bit.ly/2uxKuQN
Free Gift: http://www.marianbacoluba.com/freegift
Free 15 Minute Clarity Call: https://calendly.com/mbacoluba/claritycall
“You can’t take someone to a place you’ve never been” – Tony Robbins
When I wake up with gratitude, I know how far I’ve come.